It’s 7:30 AM.
Your child is in tears over putting on their shoes. You’ve already repeated the request six times. Gently at first, then with mounting frustration. The clock ticks louder with each minute that passes, and you feel that familiar sting of helplessness rise in your chest.
“Why is this so hard for them? Why can’t we just get through one morning without a battle?”
It’s a thought so many parents of children with ADHD whisper to themselves. You love your child endlessly, but the constant challenges, the emotional rollercoaster, and the daily unpredictability can leave you feeling lost and alone.
Here’s the truth: it’s not about laziness, bad parenting, or lack of willpower.
It’s about the way the ADHD brain is wired. And when parents begin to understand that wiring, everything changes.
The ADHD Brain: A Different Operating System
Think of the ADHD brain as a high-powered racecar: fast, dynamic, full of potential, but with bicycle brakes. It’s capable of incredible bursts of creativity and energy, but struggles to slow down, focus, or transition smoothly.
When we peek under the hood, we find three key parts of the brain working together in their own unique rhythm:
The Prefrontal Cortex: The Driver’s Seat
This is the brain’s planning and focus centre, the part that organises, prioritises, and regulates impulses. In ADHD, this region is often underactive, which can make executive function skills like starting tasks, remembering steps, or managing time more difficult.
The Amygdala: The Emotional Engine
This is the brain’s emotion centre. For ADHD brains, it’s often turned up a few notches, meaning your child may feel everything deeply and react intensely. The gift? Sensitivity and empathy. The challenge? Big feelings that can easily overwhelm both parent and child.
The Hippocampus: The Memory Highway
This is where learning and memory connect. In ADHD, that transfer can be a little glitchy, like files that won’t always save properly. Your child might forget instructions moments after hearing them, not because they weren’t listening, but because their brain’s “save button” can lag behind.
Each of these areas has strengths and struggles, but none of them are broken.
They simply operate differently, and within that difference lies remarkable creativity, intuition, and potential.
Why Talking About ADHD With Your Child Matters
Without understanding what’s happening inside their brain, many children with ADHD grow up believing something is wrong with them. They hear “focus,” “try harder,” or “pay attention” so often that shame quietly settles in.
But when a child learns that their brain works differently, not badly, that shame starts to fade. They begin to see their energy, creativity, and unique way of thinking as superpowers instead of shortcomings.
When parents talk openly about ADHD, they create a bridge between confusion and clarity.
You move from discipline and frustration to empathy and teamwork.
And that’s where confidence starts to grow in both you and your child.
How to Talk to Your Child About ADHD: Practical Strategies
Talking to your child about ADHD isn’t a one-time conversation; it’s an ongoing dialogue that builds self-understanding and confidence over time. The goal isn’t to “explain a diagnosis,” but to help them make sense of how their brain works, so they can approach challenges with curiosity and self-compassion instead of shame.
Here’s how to start building that foundation:
Lead with Strengths
Begin with what they do well.
Before diving into challenges, help your child see the brilliance in how their brain works. Kids with ADHD often hear what’s wrong (impulsivity, distraction, forgetfulness) but rarely what’s right: (creativity, imagination, intuition, empathy, energy).
Try saying:
“Your brain helps you see things other people miss. You come up with ideas that surprise me.”
When you start from pride, not problem-solving, your child learns that ADHD isn’t a flaw, it’s a different wiring with powerful potential.
Use Simple, Empowering Language
The words you choose matter. Avoid medical jargon and focus on clarity, reassurance, and teamwork.
Try:
“Your brain works a little differently. It helps you do some things really well, and it makes other things a bit trickier. And that’s okay, we’re learning together how to help your brain shine.”
This approach removes blame and shifts the focus from “fixing” to understanding. It helps your child see ADHD as something they have, not something they are.
Normalise Emotions
Children with ADHD often feel things like excitement, frustration, rejection, and overwhelm deeply. They may not always have the tools to regulate those emotions yet. By naming what’s happening, you give them language and permission to feel without shame.
You might say:
“That’s your brain sending you a message. Let’s figure out what it needs.”
When emotions are seen as signals rather than problems, your child begins to feel capable of responding instead of being swept away.
Use Visuals & Stories
Concrete examples make abstract ideas easier to grasp. You might describe the ADHD brain like a superhero’s, fast, creative, powerful, but in need of training and support to harness that power.
For instance:
“It’s like having a racecar brain. It goes super fast and does amazing things, we just need to make sure the brakes and steering work, too.”
Stories, metaphors, and pictures help children externalise their challenges and see their ADHD as something they can work with, not against.
Create Partnership
Finally, make it clear they’re not alone in this journey. Kids with ADHD thrive when they feel understood, supported, and part of a team.
Tell them:
“We’re figuring this out together. You’re never alone in this.”
When your child knows you’re in their corner, learning, adapting, and celebrating progress right alongside them, it builds trust, resilience, and self-belief that lasts far beyond childhood.
From Understanding to Action: Why Support Matters
Learning about the ADHD brain is powerful.
But learning how to work with it transforms everything.
That’s why at Mind Station, we take a strength-based, brain-based approach, helping parents understand not just what’s happening, but how to respond in ways that build connection, confidence, and calm at home.
Through our free Parent Community, you’ll find guidance, live support, and access to our Wired to Shine course, a self-paced, practical program for parents ready to bring understanding into everyday action.
Inside, you’ll learn to decode your child’s unique ADHD wiring, discover strategies that actually stick, and build confidence, one small, compassionate step at a time.
If you want to learn how to explain ADHD to your child in a way that builds their confidence, resilience, and self-understanding, we’d love to walk alongside you.
Join the free Mind Station Parent Community, your space to connect, learn, and access the tools and guidance you need to help your child truly shine.